When I was a little girl I used to always get beside my bed, get on my knees, look up toward Heaven, and pray to God! I don't know exactly when I stopped getting beside the bed on my knees, but I never stopped praying. I usually pray in the mornings on my way to work or at night as I lay in bed.
A couple of weeks ago my son, Jackson, who is 7 years old, was diagnosed with Spinal Meningitis. He had been sick on and off for a few weeks, having both high fevers and headaches. We had been to the doctor, ER, urgent care several times and we still couldn't figure out what was going on.
I finally took him to Charlotte to the ER. They admitted him immediately and started running several tests including a chest x-ray, spinal tap, echo cardiogram, etc. They ended up doing the spinal tap around 1:00 in the morning. The doctor (who was awesome) came into the room around 3 o'clock in the AM and told us something we weren't expecting.
She said, "Mr. and Mrs. Wilson, your son Jackson's white blood cell count in his spinal fluid is supposed to be under 10, his levels are 848." Both of us just sat there for a few seconds and I said, "What does that mean exactly?" She said it means he has spinal meningitis and we are not sure if it is bacterial or viral but would like to start treating him for bacterial immediately.
We knew of a man who had been diagnosed with bacterial meningitis and died within 24 hours. So I honestly, started to freak out and panic. I did not do this on the outside because I had to be strong for Jack but I was a wreck on the inside.
I went into the bathroom, shut the door, and got on my knees. I looked up toward Heaven and I prayed to the Lord. I begged for my son to get better. I asked the Lord to please not take him. I cried out to Him for strength and courage to face the hours and days ahead.
I honestly cannot imagine losing one of my children. It's one of those things that is unimaginable. My grandmother lost her son when he was just 19 years old and to see what her and my grandfather have gone through is just unthinkable. I think as a parent, that is one of those things that is your worst nightmare. But I know God can help us through anything. We are told he does not give us more than we can bear. He has a plan for each of us.
I laid in the hospital bed that night. Jack looked at me and had tears in his eyes. He said, "Mama, am I going to Heaven?" I just looked at him and said, "No baby, not if Mama can help it." Then he said, "If I do go, will you go with me?" I honestly could of crawled into a ball and started crying and screaming. But I just looked at him and said, "Your going to be just fine, we are at a great place with great doctors, and Daddy and I are not going anywhere."
There are things in life that we have no control over. Every single day is precious and is a gift. Jackson is fine. He ended up having viral meningitis. I can honestly say that was some of the scariest and most frightening days I have experienced in this life thus far.
I look at life differently now.
I now pray a prayer of thanksgiving for the life of my son and the fact that I get to be his Mama!!
These are some of my favorite pics of my beautiful boy:
This was when he was 6 months old!
He has always been the happiest boy, always smiling!!
His first ever trophy!!!
He was soooo proud when Benjamin was born!!
His favorite cousin!!
His grandmother's graduation!!
He loves to play ball!!
He said, "Just like swamp people, Mama."
This is one of those rare bonding times!!!
This would be more accurate...lol
This was after a hot day of plantation touring!
My beautiful boy!!!
My all time favorite pic of my boys!!!
I thank God everyday for the many blessings in my life: especially my three amazing children!!!
And you will say in that day: “Give thanks to the
Lord, call upon his name, make known his deeds among the peoples, proclaim that his name is exalted. “Sing praises to the
Lord, for he has done gloriously; let this be made known in all the earth.
Isaiah 12:4-5
